Dance of Masculine and Feminine

Yesterday I made a post on Facebook  about how I have always felt that Friday the 13 was a lucky day. (So far today it has been 🍀)

A conversation occurred about how 13 was the Day of the Goddess/Divine Feminine and how it was turned into something bad by the patriarchy to disempower women.

“Before Christianity came along, Friday the 13th was “a very powerful day for feminine energy and creativity,” writes Tanaaz Chubb, an LA-based intuitive behind the website Forever Conscious. “Before patriarchal times, Friday the 13th was considered the day of the Goddess. It was considered a day to worship the Divine Feminine that lives in us all and to honor the cycles of creation and death and rebirth.”

So it awesome to honor the Feminine today. Not only awesome but important!

But here is the truth as I see it.

Every man and woman alive today has been high Jacked by the patriarchy. We all came into the world and dropped into the patriarchal program and learn how to live based on the program. We didn’t choose it!

Men learned how to be men and women learned to be women. We learned from wounded men and women, who came from a long line of wounded people. Women have been struggling for equal rights since the sixties. It hasn’t been easy being a woman and we should be celebrated.

My guess is, it isn’t easy being a man either.

I was in situation several months ago where there were men and women in the same small room and women were putting men down as if they weren’t even there. I was actually the only white person in the room. It got to the point where I couldn’t listen any more and I stood up and said “I see a lot of nice men in this room and the way you are talking about men as if these guys aren’t even here is really upsetting to me.” The room went silent and one by one the women apologized.

We are all trying to find balance between the masculine and feminine energy in a time when there aren’t a lot of role models. Each person who takes a step towards wholeness should be celebrated!!!

I said this on a post, someone else wrote, a couple of days ago when it felt as though people were dissing men, “There are a lot of beautiful men who are in touch with their hearts, an in whose presence you feel expansive.” And I have always believed this. Men need to be cherished not chastised.

We ( men and women) need to cheer each other on for being on the planet at this time. It’s hard for all of us! We are here to bring back balance between the masculine and feminine, not holding the old paradigm in place by believing and responding to the old stereotypes.  The more we respond to each other out of stereotypes we only keep what we don’t want in place.

The Dalai Lama said the world would be saved by the western women. I think it will be saved by men and women coming together in wholeness.

It’s cause to celebrate that many of us are doing the deep work to bring back balance.

I painted this in 2002

Believe in Miracles!

I had to share! Miracles happen💫

I was supposed to have oral surgery today. I am so phobic about the dentist so my anxiety was extremely high this morning. And while I was waiting for the dentist I thought about leaving a couple of times.

They were going to cut open my gums and do a procedure to clear an infection. I went out last night and stocked up on soft foods.

A couple of weeks ago in meditation I asked for a miracle. I asked that the issue healed so I wouldn’t have to have surgery. I was given a special technology to work with. The message I received was that the doctor would change his mind about what he would be doing because I wouldn’t need surgery.

The dentist came in and looked at my teeth and said, so we are going to pull that tooth. I have a tooth that is loose that needs to be pulled. I said what about that fistula on the other tooth that you were going to do surgery on? He looked again and looked at my records and said, “you’re right there was a fistula on the other side, but it’s gone now.” I asked if that ever happens and he said it’s rare.

I went to the waiting room with tears in my eyes and told my daughter about asking for a miracle and not needing surgery. She was there as my driver because I wasn’t supposed to drive afterwards.

I drive her crazy with my miracles! She said now you will think you can heal anything. I said yep, the tumor is next!!!

Tears of gratitude!

 

Accepting and letting go unlock the blessing

Accepting what is, is hard for our human nature, especially when we are asked to accept something that is challenging. We want to have some sense that we are in control. That’s human nature.

This is partly because of how the unknown outcome plays out in our mind. We think we know how something will turn out before it does and in challenging situation the story usually isn’t positive. Not many of us go through challenging situations and believe the best will happen unless we have done a lot of deep inner work. I have done a lot of deep personal work and it is still hard for me.

What if letting go of what you fear might happen, opens the door for your best possible outcome to happen? what if things really do always work out for your highest and best? I have had this happen on a number of occasions but I usually have to go through my control gyrations first. You would think positive experience would dictate response but that doesn’t always happen, especially with health challenges.

What if the story you conjure up in your mind is no where near the outcome that is intended and you are blocking a blessing by holding on?

The deeper healing comes when you can say to yourself, here is what I am afraid will happen and I accept that too, no matter how bad you think that will be. You can’t trust the highest outcome if you are busy trying to control.

Today I am practicing acceptance, patience and letting go.

Question, how does letting go and holding a positive intention for the outcome fit together? Or does it not fit together? Is intention setting just another form of control?

Yesterday I Lost My Mind

Yesterday I lost my mind!

I dropped from my mind into my heart and my heart started to speak about a key issue I have worked on/with for a big part of my life. You know that one that is slippery, yet insidious, that you can’t quite understand? That one that sneaks up on you when you least expect it.

As I wrote in my journal, I watched it unravel, before my eyes, in a way I had never seen before. It because crystal clear so I could see it. I could feel it release from my cells this time and I felt a lightness I had never felt before.

I understood that there is both a collective program/matrix and a personal program/matrix that hold each other in place. It takes deep, deep inner work to extract yourself because these programs reinforce each other so it’s hard to see. I am grateful for my tenacious persistence to do the deep work to free myself. Many people never get free.

I thank my heart for all it has shown me ❤️

Giving up was not an option

I am writing this to remind myself…

There was a point in my health journey where I had not only lost my health but also my savings and my livelihood. It was about 8 months in that my savings was gone, my successful career was gone and all of my credit cards were maxed out from basic living and medical bills. This was probably the most stressful time in my life.

But something kept pulling me forward. The pull was my purpose. My purpose this lifetime has always been to create art that had a positive, transformational impact. Writing, which is part of that purpose came later. I write from the same place as I paint.

This is to say that when I was at my lowest lows, I still could paint and I still could write and those two things pulled me through. I could also see there would be a time when I could fully live my purpose again. That what I was going through had meaning in this purpose and I wasn’t intended to die from it.

And so I painted…and I wrote…32 paintings focused on the heart and several other paintings. I wrote and illustrated a children’s book. I wrote Resilient Heart a book all about heart health and my journey. I wrote Resilient Heart Art, the healing power of art. I built an Etsy site and two new websites for my art and writing. I created a festival for artists and writers to combine my to loves. All while I was sick. Those things pulled me through my illness and kept me focused on my purpose.

I was grateful for each positive step forward no matter how small.

So now getting 4 shows for my art in 3 days tells me my focus paid off. Getting the feed back from curators that they are touched by my art means a lot. It shows me I have built momentum. I am in a place of joy because my physical crisis is finally over and I am in the flow of the vision I held for the past 3 years.

I am sharing this not to brag but to give someone, somewhere hope. No matter what happens hold on to your dream. Let it lift you up and maybe out of where you are right now.

Today I thank myself for not giving up.